Rating: PG-13, graphic violence
Pairing/Characters: Devin Setoguchi/Torrey Mitchell, Jason Demers
Dedication: joolzie, the indirect source of my interest in zombies. *coughs*
Disclaimer: It's all lies!
Author's Notes: Hockey/zombies AU. The zombie apocalypse occurs on 1/15/11, ruining Devin's, Torrey's and (especially) Jason's day. Title is from the first volume of The Walking Dead comic trade paperback, the main inspiration for this fic.
Days Gone Bye, Part 1
The alarm clock started blaring at 8:30 in the morning, which was the way Devin Setoguchi woke up every day (except for off days). He instinctively tried to swing his arm over to hit the snooze button and clubbed Torrey Mitchell in the process, which was the way Torrey woke up every day (except for off days).
They both made grumbling noises and shifted a little, trying to find the magic position that would put them back to sleep, but they were both past the point of no return. Torrey sat up, rubbing his eyes, and reached for his phone to check for texts and new emails.
"Whoa!" he exclaimed, reading his first text. "Hey, Devin! The game is cancelled tonight because of the flu epidemic. No make up game scheduled yet."
Devin sat up as well, grabbing his own phone to check whether he'd received a similar text; he didn't quite trust Torrey given the recent series of pranks they'd played on each other. Once he'd confirmed that Torrey was telling the truth, he turned to him wide-eyed. "Holy shit, it's true! There's a fucking zombie outbreak!"
Torrey looked at him incredulously. "Uhh, zombies? It's the flu. How did you get from flu to zombies?"
"Does the flu make people start shuffling around? Does the flu make people start groaning instead of talking? Does the flu make people try to start chewing on other people?" Devin crossed his arms exasperatedly. "Does the flu bring people back from the dead?"
"Okay, first of all, the Bug is really bad. It knocks you out so badly you don't even have the strength to walk properly. You get a hoarse throat so you can't talk, and I don't even know where you got the whole chewing on other people thing from. Maybe the high fever makes people delirious." Torrey shook his head as there was a knock at their bedroom door. It was their housemate, Jason Demers.
"Check your phone, there's no game tonight! Go back to sleep!" Devin yelled, then turned his attention back to Torrey. "Well, what about the coming back from the dead thing then? Huh? Huh? You got an explanation for that?"
"People aren't coming back from the dead--that's impossible! The Bug just makes people's vitals so weak that a lot of them are mistaken for dead," Torrey said, stubbornly.
There was more knocking at the door.
"What do you want, Jason?" Devin shouted in an irritated tone. "I'm telling you, man, I saw one of these zombies in the neighborhood. It was the guy with the doberman. He was trying to fucking eat his dog!"
"Maybe he was playing with it," Torrey said, getting out of bed and grabbing the shirt and shorts he'd slung over the back of a chair and putting them on.
"People don't play with their dogs by trying to take bites out of their legs!" Devin rolled his eyes and got out of bed too.
"Well, did you call the SPCA?" Torrey asked with concern.
The knocking on the door had become louder, more insistent; it was starting to sound more like banging than knocking.
Devin got dressed as well, then yelled, "Just come in already--the door's open!"
There was a brief silence, but the door didn't open and Devin and Torrey exchanged looks of confusion. Then the banging resumed, only now it sounded like someone was taking a sledgehammer to the door. Devin walked over to the door and opened it, ready to give Jason some hell.
"What the fuck are you-" His words died in his throat and Torrey hurried over to see what had silenced him, then gasped in shock.
Jason Demers was standing outside their door a few steps away from it, head lowered, blood dripping from a huge gash in his forehead that was also matting his dark hair. He had impossibly dark circles under his eyes and his skin had taken on an ashen hue, like he'd been sprinkled with flour. He stumbled forward into the room, no longer obstructed by the closed door, as Devin and Torrey reflexively parted to let him through.
"Holy shit!" Devin screamed, in a girlishly high pitch. "Jason's turned into a fucking zombie! Oh my God!"
"Don't be ridiculous! He's just got the Bug and he's delirious and hallucinating or something. We've got to get him some help; come on, let's take him to the hospital." Torrey stepped towards Jason and stretched his arm out to steady him and Jason's head perked up, causing some of the blood dripping down his face to spray on the carpet. He opened his mouth and started to make a horrible groaning sound as he lurched towards Torrey.
"Look out, he's trying to eat you!" Devin warned, looking around the room desperately for a weapon to use on Jason.
"He's not trying to-" Torrey started to say, then stopped as Demers grabbed his arm and yanked it to his mouth. His teeth glistened as he prepared to close his jaws on Torrey's forearm when suddenly his head was knocked back about three feet by a hardcover copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. The rest of his body staggered back along with his head, then steadied itself and started shuffling towards Torrey again.
"Oh my God, he was trying to eat my arm!" Torrey screamed, backing away in horror.
Devin smashed Jason in the head again with a two-handed swing of Harry Potter, knocking him onto the ground. The blow opened up another gash in his head and the blood flowed freely from the new wound. Jason started to sit up slowly.
"Don't just stand there," Devin said. "Go get something to bash his head in. Get a chainsaw or an axe or something. Hurry!"
Torrey gaped at Jason for a moment before snapping out of it and raced out of the bedroom. Devin heard him tearing the house apart trying to find a weapon and bludgeoned Jason again with the book.
"Shit, I was almost at the end of this," he thought, looking sadly at the bloodstained pages. "Hey, what the fuck is taking so long?" he yelled at Torrey.
"We don't have any fucking chainsaws or axes!" Torrey screamed back. There were more sounds of rummaging and furniture being thrown around and doors being thrown open and closed before Torrey finally returned, carrying a baseball bat.
Devin looked up and said impatiently, "Well, what are you waiting for? Kill him already!" Jason was starting to get up again and Devin thumped him in the face, then screamed at Torrey. "Now!"
Torrey got a good grip on the bat, took a deep breath and swung downward as hard he could, connecting with a sickening crack. Jason was still moving, so Torrey raised the bat and struck him again a few times, trying to ignore the sound of wood hitting flesh and bone, and the blood that was splattering on him.
"Okay, I think you can stop now," Devin said, grabbing Torrey's arm to stop him. "He's not moving anymore."
They sank slowly to the floor, dropping their respective weapons and breathing hard. Torrey looked down at his clothes and started trying to brush off unidentified parts of Jason from his legs. Devin stared at what was left of Jason, nudging his leg lightly with his feet, not fully convinced that Jason was dead--well, completely dead.
Neither of them moved for another ten minutes, when Devin suddenly sprang to his feet and pointed down at Torrey with a triumphant shout.
"Told you they were zombies! In your face, Torrey! In your face!"