?

Log in

No account? Create an account

The Invincible M.A.E.


Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Martian Love
harleymae

Poor Marian

Well, the last thing I expected to be doing last night was standing in an auditorium full of people chanting "cunt" together with them.

My roommate's sister directed a production of The Vagina Monologues at UC Berkeley. I'd never watched it before and only vaguely knew what it was about, but I really enjoyed it. Everyone gave a great performance and it was all staged very well. It got me to thinking about being a woman. I like being a woman, always have. I have three older sisters, and I went to an all-girls school until i was 16. Being female just was.

I was really shocked by the stories of all those people who were like, oh, I've never seen my vagina. How can you not ever have looked at your own vagina??? Aren't you curious what's down there? Don't you want to look at it to clean it properly? And people who are like... uhh, I don't like it, it's ugly. Who cares? It's a happy, happy place! That should trump all perceived ugliness.

Next on the shocked list is how could you never have an orgasm???

So speaking of women, well, women's names, I love this story about Marian. :D

I hurt Marian Hossa's feelings

So I went to the Canucks-Thrashers game tonight, and I decided that I should bring a humorous sign. I settled on "Marian is a girl's name", stenciled it onto a big piece of posterboard, colored it in with magic marker, and it was all ready to go. I brought it into the game (but not before the security guards saw it and burst out laughing) and went as close to the ice as I could get, which in this case was right up against the glass. It was the pregame skate, and the Thrashers were whizzing by. I held the sign up, hoping to get noticed. A couple fans took pictures of it, and gave me the thumbs-up. Then Bobby Holik saw it, and grinned. At least, I think it was a grin, it's hard to tell with Holik. Next came Jon Sim. He cracked a big smile. Skating over to Marian himself, who at the time was laughing it up with Kovalchuk and Kozlov, he tapped his shoulder with his stick and gestured towards me. Marian turned to look. His smile faded instantly, and changed to what could best be described as "the look a puppy gets when it makes a mess on the floor and is being scolded for it." Amid stifled giggles from his other team-mates, Marian slowly skated off the ice and into the dressing room. And I felt like I had grown as a man that night. At least my name wasn't "Marian."


Ahahahahahaha, oh man, this makes me love him even more.

I think Ehrhoff needs to be beaten with a stick until he remembers to be awesome most, if not all, of the time. He is the big offensive guy among the defensemen and he needs to play like it. It would probably be inspirational for Matt Carle too. Vlasic has the instincts, but not the big ass shot.

  • 1
I was briefly stunned by the transition from vaginas to Marian. You don't see that every day!

What does Marian know about vaginas anyway? *chortles*

We're SURE he doesn't have one?

Not even in a jar in his closet?

*shrieks* Marian is a crazed internet serial killer!!! His brother has no internets, though.

There's a production of The Vagina Monologues at my school. too, this year - I really want to go. I really have heard nothing but good things abouts it!

And OH GOD. That story about Marian. You know, that was totally my first reaction too, the first time I heard of him. "You mean...there's girls playing professional hockey men's hockey who isn't a woan?? COOL!" [Imagine my disappointment when I realized that Marian was not a girl, I think. :( ] Regardless, that story? Is really, really kind of hilarious and awesome.

Also, I haven't really watched a Sharks game in a very long time, but I really like Christian Ehrhoff, and it sucks that he is sucking. Booooo. Yes! BEAT HIM! BEAT HIM GOOD UNTIL HE ATTAINS BRILLIANCE. Or um. Something.

That sign could be recycled for when the Wild come to town.

He has flashes of good play, but he needs to get it into his head that he's awesome and should be like that all the time. The Olympics were good for him last year, cos' well, Team Germany needed him. I'm optimistic he will step it up at the right time.

My first reaction to that story about Marian was "Awwww....poor Marian. I hope someone gave him a hug." lol

Maybe he just held on to his security blanket and sucked his thumb for a while.

I was really shocked by the stories of all those people who were like, oh, I've never seen my vagina. How can you not ever have looked at your own vagina??? Aren't you curious what's down there? Don't you want to look at it to clean it properly? And people who are like... uhh, I don't like it, it's ugly. Who cares? It's a happy, happy place! That should trump all perceived ugliness.

Next on the shocked list is how could you never have an orgasm???


SERIOUSLY. Shocking and not a little depressing.

And hee, I did wonder if that story was true when I saw it, but it's pretty great even if it's not! ::cuddles Marian::

The image of dejected!Marian kills me.

I love the Vagina Monologues so hard. Although I always want to scold Ensler, on account of how it's really the vulva she's generally talking about (and "vulva" is the far prettier word). But I forgive her. She went with the harder word to reclaim, after all, which I can respect. And getting a whole crowd going with "Cunt!" earns major props. :)

Also: My Angry Vagina, The Woman Who Loved to Make Vaginas Happy, The Vagina Workshop.. . . Gah, I love that show. <3

And I tend to love the ways it's staged. Red and black and cushions and boas and sassiness made tangible!

Unfortunately, there is no word for the whole package. There really should be one! Angry Vagina was awesome! My favourite was one by a genderqueer girl(?) who talked about her own story, so I think that was unique to last night's production.

Moaner started out really well, but then I thought it kind of went off-topic with all the different moans and never got back to what I thought was the interesting stuff, with respect to female domination. I mean, men moan too. :P

There was red and black and boas, but other than that, just chairs and mikes.

The woman who inspired the moaning one actually went after Ensler about that. :D Well, sort of.. saying Ensler missed a lot of what she was talking about, the actual appreciation and give and take, saying she got too caught up in the rest of it. Actually accused her of objectifying women all over again. So there's a wonderful reprisal in the book version, trying to make it right. It's fantastic.

I haven't heard about the genderqueer one, so it probably was original to that! Too, too cool.

Okay. so there's this guy among my friends called Neu, and there's this line that someone said at some point and that people now throw around at random provocations about him. And I always think of this line when I hear/read the word "vulva". And now is no exception. And so with enough exposition, I will just say it:

"Neu thinks a vulva is a Swedish car!"

Actually, that might well be true of Marian, too.

I've always wanted to see the Vagina Monologues. You'd reccommend it?

Yeah, it was funny and serious and sad and cool in the sense that it made me reflect on my own experiences as a woman.

Okay, I can see the never having an orgasm *never has* but .. do you just clean down there and not look? That's weird to me. I don't go out of my WAY to look lol but come on, that's a little weird

Well, presumably that's because you have a reason to, and not that you like... tried and failed?

I don't know how that works! I guess you don't necessarily have to look. I don't know why people would be so avoidant! It's not going to bite.

yeah dude that is sstrange and kinda sad

aww marian *giggles*

They aired a segment on Marian with a bunch of kids at the aquarium. He was incredibly enthusiastic and lame with them. His lameness made me want to pounce him. :(

That was a big transition going from vaginas to Marian=)

Awww poor Marian...want to give him a hug now! And his teammates were giggling at him=)

Marian stamping his feet! "Stop laughing! Wah!"

Whenever someone mentions Marian, I can't help thinking of that song from The Music Man.

Madame libraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarian!

Oh man, Marian would be such a librarian. Did you see the segment where he takes a bunch of kids to the aquarium?

No!

What can I do, my dear, to catch your ear! I love you madly, madly, madame librarian! Marian!

Who would be his sleazy Harold Hill, though?

Perhaps someone will upload it to YouTube. He's incredibly lame in it. I wonder if the kids felt sorry for him.

  • 1