Don't you think Patrick Denis Marleau and Marco Johann Sturm would look lovely on a wedding invitation? How glad are you that you weren't named Scott Scott Hannan? And Shane Albert Doan just spells SAD.
Then of course there's Bill Robert Guerin (Billy Bob!) and Jason William Arnott. That's gotta be a mistake. It's Jason fucking Arnott.
Brad William Stuart sounds kinda' distinguished, while Todd Douglas Ross Harvey sounds like the in-laws settled for a compromise. Evgeni Vitorovich Nabokov and Alexander Ivanovich Korolyuk are very Russian. Owen Liam Nolan is very Irish.
Why do Scott C. Thornton, Alyn D. McCauley and Teemu I. Selanne tease me so? And Jonathan Earl Cheechoo? Har!